Moola: What To Do With Your Money if You're Already Fantastically Rich
Once you've made your millions, you need to know how to handle
them. This book covers all your options, from filling your pool with dollar
bills and diving in to rubbing fistfuls of gold coins over your body
like moisturizing soap. Is it better to light ten cigars with hundred-dollar
bills or one with a thousand-dollar bill? We answer these questions and more.
The Coming Financial Apocalypse, Fourteenth Edition
America's most prolific financial doomsayer publishes the highly-anticipated
fourteenth edition of his long-running guide to the upcoming complete
meltdown of the world's financial markets any day now. This edition
contains all of the information published in the first thirteen
editions, plus a new essay on how the author was slightly off before and why
ruin is definitely now just around the corner.
Running a Sweatshop From Your Home
Maybe you've always dreamed of owning your own sweatshop, but thought
it was beyond your means. It's not! This book shows you how you can
start a sweatshop in your very own home in just a few hours a week.
Convert that guest room into an unsanitary, unsafe industrial production
center, hire just a couple subsistence-level workers and you're on
your way! Soon you'll be oppressing more underlings than you thought possible!
The Professional Guide to Résumé Lies
Experts agree that the way to create a professional-quality résumé is to
lie like a sniveling weasel. Many helpful hints teach you how to cover
up rehab and jail terms with "community college courses," give yourself
cherry positions in "failed startups" and get friends to serve as
Secrets of The Ladies' Tea and Protection Society
In October of 1994, The Ladies' Tea Society of Urbana, Ill. decided to
add a little spice to their gatherings by dabbling in protection schemes.
With only a small investment in bribes to local law enforcement agencies
and another in rags and gasoline, the Ladies were able to intimidate
local shop owners into paying out hundreds of thousands of dollars! And
now they show you how you can too.
Recycle Your Way to Riches
Many people don't realize how much money they can save each year
by following the three Rs: "Reduce, Reuse, Recycle." Have leftover
gold bars lying around the house? Don't throw them out! They can be
traded for cash at local financial institutions. That renaissance-era
oil painting may be an eyesore to you, but an art gallery will be happy
to take it off your hands in exchange for cold, hard currency. Houseguests,
once you're finished with them, can be converted into hostages for another
source of income. The sky's the limit!