Thanks to faithful reader Lish Daelnar, I finally got
my trembling hands on some Boo-Berry for the first time
in my adult life. The fact that it had "Casper and Wendy
Marshmallows" barely detracted from the sinus-clearing
joy of acquisition. It's hard to be objective through
the haze of nostalgia, but this is damn fine cereal. You
have to admire a cereal with the spheres to stick with
one fruit flavor during the modern flavor expansion. No
wildberry, no watermelon, just something vaguely
resembling blueberry flavor. With marshmallows. B+
Mini Wheats Frosted Original
Weirdly arranged name aside, Mini Wheats Frosted Original
neé Frosted Mini-Wheats are the ultimate in
mixed breakfast metaphors. Shredded Wheat pads
are basically hay bales, and frosting, original or no, can't change that.
Whether you're downing Frosted Mini-Hay Bales, Bite-Sized Hay Bales, or
even if they made Marshmallow Blasted Hay Bales, you can't escape the fact
that you're enjoying the great taste of hay bales. D+
A deceptive cereal. First, there's the question of two scoops
of raisins, and what that means.
Last time I checked, the American National Standards Institute
hasn't issued a definitive statement on the volume of a
"scoop." Doubtless one could pick up a miniature scoop with
a capacity of one raisin, so assuming these are whole
raisins, all they're guaranteeing is that there are no fewer
than two raisins in each box.
Secondly, this comes across as a healthful cereal, when in fact those
all-natural sun-poked juicy raisins are so coated in white
sugar that they look like larval pods from "Aliens: A Christmas
Story." I once tried an all-natural raisin bran cereal, and
it was pretty good once I poured a bunch of sugar on it. C+
They started referring to it as simply "Pops" in the
"sugar" sounds too unhealthy and "corn" sounds too healthy, so
that all cereals from now on must be abstract allusions to
the fun you'll inevitably have completely ignoring the
suggestion that you serve them with milk, juice and toast.
All right, fine then. Negative: they have the texture of
packing material. Positive: Ever since childhood, packing
material has always looked to me like something you should
pour milk on and eat anyway. C
This was one of the best of cereals that are now dead, gone,
and pushing up boxtops. I was not a huge fan of the Smurfs.
Heck, I'd give the Snorks two-to-one odds against them in
a fair fight. But this was good cereal, made up of blue
artifical-tasting units and red artifical-tasting units, both
of which tasted exactly the same. The disturbing bit, though
is that this cereal was created by Ralston-Purina, and the
cereal bits were the same size and shape as Little Friskies.
Weird. And, I might add, eerie. A