Our existence has many banes, don't get us wrong. "Chock
Full O' Banes," should be the slogan of our extremely bane-ridden
existence. However, one of the major banes of our
existence is picking up a delicious-looking, poisonous-frog-red
candy treat, expecting some variety of fruit flavor, only to
find ourselves awash in cinnamon.
Now really, a country that can settle on a standard size for
individually wrapped cheese slices ought to be able to set up
a reliable color-flavor mapping schema. Towards that end, we're
providing you, our often-sexy reading audience, a chance to decide once and
for all what "red" is. Use the voting form below, and the one that ends
up above the inimitable "Line of Truth" is what you can expect
from your scarlet treats.
Update: Voting closed, and the winner is the inimitable, yet
often artificial, Strawberry. This is going to make eating Jelly
Bellys a lot easier.
||"Wild" Cherry, whatever that means|
||Whatever flavor red licorice is|
||Whatever flavor Swedish gummi fish are|
||"Berry." Just "Berry"|