Sure, other beauty enhancements eliminate wrinkles, enhance measurements, firm your face, remove hair, restore hair, re-color hair, and replace your teeth with something shiny and straight, but isn't that just beating around the bush?

The fact is, you're ugly. And you want to be less ugly. So why not cut straight to the heart of the matter and come to No-Ugly Labs? There we use a patented process that delves deep into every pore in your body and actually removes the ugly.

Until now, beauty enhancements could only attack ugliness from the fringes with long and painful treatments that, often as not, left you much poorer and still ugly. Our process, on the other hand, uses special oils and lotions that seek out and attack ugly where it lives: in each unattractive and repulsive cell in your body.

As the ugly is encountered, it's neutralized by the special hormonal collagen silicone protein enzymes, rendering the ugly inert, and making you less of a disgusting mass of pitiful homeliness. After repeated treatments, many of our clients have reported 100 percent ugly eradication, meanwhile making you that much uglier by comparison.

The solution? Come to No-Ugly Labs yourself, and experience the stable relationships, societal approval, and lack of deep, aching self-loathing that de-uglification can bring.

No-Ugly Labs: Because You're Ugly