The Brunching Shuttlecocks Features


Favorite Pen Insurance
Insures against filching, misplacing or leaving in a public place. Does not cover running out of ink or stains associated with pen. $3.50 coverage, $0.25 deductible. Cost: $0.22/year

Dollar Coin Insurance
Protects against accidentally spending a Sacajawea or Susan B. Anthony dollar instead of the intended quarter in any circumstance, such as tipping, paying cab fare, or buying a mint patty from the charity box at the 7-11. $0.75 coverage, no deductible. Cost: $0.06/year

Too Much Lettuce Insurance
Pays in case of lettuce becoming brown, rotted, or unreasonably limp because you had meant to start eating more salads but never got around to it. $2.19 coverage, $0.10 deductible. Cost: $0.15/year

Second Rental Insurance
Protects against renting a movie, only to realize that you had seen the same movie years before and had completely forgotten about it. Does not cover a movie watched on television or cable. $2.50 coverage, $0.15 deductible. Cost: $0.17/year.

Wart Insurance
Pays for over-the-counter medication for the treatment of up to 3 warts in a given calendar year. Does not cover genital warts or other skin blemishes. $8/incident coverage, no deductible. Cost: $0.56/year.

No Life Insurance
Designed for people with no dependents, no family, and no particular reason to have a nice funeral, this policy pays for dinner for two at a reasonably nice restaurant for a randomly chosen insurance agent, so that you can feel that you improved at least one person's life. $25 coverage, no deductible. Cost: $0.45/year.

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