Putting the 'Intern' in 'Internet'
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[Actually, that's not true. The server's fine.
My name's Stewart Greer, and I work for ServTech Industries.
I'm not sure why I put this message in. I guess I'm just
trying, in my own way, to reach out beyond the cubicle walls
and spacious parking lot of my workplace, trying to make
some real human contact in this online world, a world where
everyone is spending so much time communicating that there's
nobody left to listen.]
[Does anyone out there who care that my
hairline is receding and my only sexual experience was with
my cousin Tillie in the 8th grade and that I wake up
most nights at 2 AM with a sudden powerful desire to become a woman?
No, everybody's too busy with their stock quotes and their
live cameras to wonder if maybe one of the people
who makes all this possible needs someone to talk to. Someone
who won't judge or stare at my teeth. Someone who doesn't
walk more quickly when they pass by my cubicle, and who would
never ask me to use tongs when taking a bagel from the bag because
of the rash. Someone who cares.]
[Ah, well. It's not like there's any chance of anyone seeing
this. This message will only show up if someone tries to
put up a page with the words "blow job," "Yoo-Hoo brand chocolate
drink," "Motley Crüe," and "mezzanine" in it, and what
are the chances of THAT ever happening? Time to sink back into
quiet, cringing desperation for the rest of my life.]