| Language |
Advantages |
Disadvantages |
|
Spanish
|
Useful in much of the United States.
|
Soccer isn't any more interesting when you understand what the announcers are saying.
|
|
French
|
People will think you're really smart and cultured.
|
We lied. Nobody cares.
|
|
German
|
You'll be the only one at the bar who can pronounce "hefeweizen" correctly.
|
Spittle.
|
|
Swedish
|
Great letters like ö and Å
|
"Bork bork bork" is not actual Swedish.
|
|
Japanese
|
Opens you up to a whole new world of animated cinema.
|
You'll realize that your cool imported sweatshirt with Japanese characters on it says "I wear pleasing frilly undergarments."
|
|
Esperanto
|
You'll be ahead of the game when Esperanto is declared the universal language and required of all UN delegates.
|
Ain't gonna happen, bucko.
|
|
Latin
|
You'll be able to read Ovid in the original idiom.
|
Oh, please. You couldn't even manage to finish "The Celestine Prophecy."
|
|
Klingon
|
You can watch "Star Trek" movies with your eyes closed.
|
The pity and loathing of all right-thinking people everywhere.
|
