There are too damn many pop songs. Ever since the one-hit wonder de-regulation of the Eighties, international leaders have agreed that the wandering herds of pop choking the globe should be culled for the good of the planet. Attempts to reach an agreement on which to destroy, however, have always failed, with the United States insisting on a unilateral ABBA ban while refusing to even consider the sweeping Billy Joel reductions that the European Union is asking for.

In keeping with our history of international diplomacy (we regularly order commemorative stamps from obscure island nations), we've come up with a solution that's as simple as it is equitable: simply remove the great many songs with titles that cancel each other out. "Rain" by Madonna and "No Rain" by Blind Melon, poof. "Don't Stand So Close to Me" by The Police, and "Don't Go Away" by Oasis, poof. You get the idea.

So we want your help with this one. Send us your cancellations via the form at the bottom of the page. We'll put our favorites on this page, to be presented to the United Nations whenever we get around to it, and we'll put all the others elsewhere.

Note: We've closed out the form. If you're really dying to submit, you can mail us, but we can't say how quickly we'll get it up there.

Mark (Gabriel@cowland.com)

James Robinson (James-Robinson@msn.com)

parade (parade@evolve.com)

Jason Abbott (jasona@brimstone.com)

Rkk

Jeff Farris (farris.15@osu.edu)

Mike Stevens (mstevens@boole.com)

Andrew (alipsett@mail.slc.edu)

Ranjeet Rao (rrao@uiuc.edu)

Karina Gohde (karinago@sas.upenn.edu)

jasonlovesshioru (oohmama@hotmail.com)

Colby Cunningham (ccunningham@wesleyan.edu)

John Campbell (J.M.Campbell@durham.ac.uk)

Xebra (jambo@ionet.net)

Hunter Brooks (skoorbhe@hotmail.com)

Kevin Matchstick (NotKeldon@aol.com)

Rosey (Rosey2381@aol.com)

Ranjeet Rao (rrao@uiuc.edu)

diane (rsmc@glis.net)

K Bishop (bishopk@gusun.georgetown.edu)

Diggit (bgray@go-racecar.com)

kathleen (kathleen@nanospace.com)

Patricia Miller (pmiller2@facstaff.wisc.edu)

Dave Yonteff (yontef44@potsdam.edu)

Jon Hantler (jonathan_hantler@putnaminv.com)

Luna (lunavudu@aol.com)

cindy (cindy1092@hotmail.com)

Craig (krusty@lungfish.com)

Danica Donalies (donalied@nasd.com)

Xebra (jambo@ionet.net)

Sean McCauley (smccauley@wesleyan.edu) [Also pin (al75@cornell.edu)]

gary voegtle (wordman48@hotmail.com)

Jhen

Jaime (strike34@ix.netcom.com)

Lore Fitzgerald Sjöberg

Dave Neilsen

Whitney Fitzgerald Freemesser (whitfitz@servtech.com)

Peg Tallan (peg_tallan@Lotus.com)

Eric H. (ehahnsolo1@aol.com)

Josh Thomson

CB (tangent@thuntek.net)

Ron Ramos (rcramos@mail.biosis.org)

The Matchity (Matchity@asylum.com)

Michael Schwartz (michael_schwartz@spe.sony.com)

Erin Fitzgerald Baumgarner (galleria@i84.net)

Roger Friedman (rfriedman@phillips.com)

John (jnieset@aol.com)