The Brunching Shuttlecocks Features

Okay, let's start with a basic truth. Dead people are pretty creepy.

I mean just the thought of a dead person is creepy in and of itself, but dead people who talk to you, that's even creepier. Dead people who talk to you and look like they're decomposing in front of your eyes, that's just creepy to the nth degree.

So The Sixth Sense has some really good creepiness going for it. I mean some truly classic creep.

Unfortunately for the movie, we know this.

This is a classic example of a good movie that loses a little something in the translation due to the trailer. The movie had this great, creepy trailer that hinged on a cute little boy whispering to Bruce Willis "I see dead people."

Suddenly the hairs rise on the back of your neck and you're creeped out. A kid who sees dead people! And Bruce Willis is around to help him. Sounds great!

Except you don't learn that the kid sees dead people until half way through the movie. So all the really tense building that the flick's trying to do is useless, because you end up sitting there thinking "Yeah, yeah, yeah, where are the dead people?"

Meet little boy. He's shy, weird and really, really scared most of the time. But he won't say why (he sees dead people.) Bruce Willis is the child psychologist who wants to help the cute little boy with his problem (seeing dead people) but he can't get the child to tell him what's troubling him (the seeing dead people thing.) There is some strange stuff going on, but the director never lets us actually know what's happening (the kid's seeing dead people), teasing us, making us guess (I'm guessing the kid's seeing dead people.) Finally, enough is enough and you want to stand up and chant Monty Python, "Bring Out Your Dead!!!!!"

Finally, the kid delivers his line, Bruce looks shocked, and the audience says "Well Duh! Didn't you see the preview?"

To be honest, the movie is still quite good. A bit slow at times, especially when you're waiting to see dead people, but eventually the cat's out of the bag, and the dead come a-calling. And that's really creepy.

So the kid has The Sixth Sense. Seeing dead people. It goes well with the other five senses. Taste, touch, sight, hearing, smell, seeing dead people. Cool. I've often thought about what it would be like to have a sixth sense, and after seeing this movie, I think it would suck. Last thing I want is a bunch of dead people dropping by all the time to creep me out.

"Hi Mr. Self-Made Critic. I'm dead."

"And decomposing! Ew! Shoo! Shoo!"

No, not something I need to go through. Way too creepy.

I'm giving The Sixth Sense 3 3/5 Babylons. Certainly not a horrible movie, but a bit of a plodder at times.

Editor's Note:

Usually I really like the extra stuff the SMC puts in the "Starring" category, but I don't understand this one. Can someone enlighten me, or verify that I'm not the idiot in this team?

The Sixth Sense
Rated: PG-13
Directed By: M. Night Shyamalan
Starring: Bruce Willis, Cary Grant, Olivia Williams, Jessica Tandy, John Wayne, Haley Joel Osment, Bela Lugosi and Arsenio Hall's career.

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