Years ago, John Belushi and Dan Aykroyd made a movie that changed life on this planet as we know it.

No, not "Neighbors," although that was pretty good too.

The Blues Brothers changed the way we looked at car crashes and Illinois Nazis. It was a religious experience, plain and simple. And the music rocked.

John is dead. Dan's career died around the time he made Nothing But Trouble. So it was time to don the hat, the glasses, the suit and bring the blues back to America.

Pity.

OK, divide and conquer this film into two parts. Part one is a series of music videos. Part one rocks. Part two is a story about getting the band back together. Part two does not rock.

Here's the story. It's eighteen years later. Elwood Blues is released from prison. Jake is dead. Elwood decides to get the band back together. Along the way he meets John Goodman, Joe Morton and a kid.

You had to know this movie was trouble as soon as you they put a precocious little kid in it. The Original Blues Brothers had no place for a kid. Kids get in the way of large car chases and seedy music. Kids are wrong! Down with kids! Down!!!

Have you seen the first movie? Then you've seen this one. Once again, they go to great lengths to find a place to fit the same people in the movie. There's Aretha Franklin. There's James Brown. There's Frank Oz. Not good enough? Let's add Wilson Pickett, B.B. King, Steve Winwood, Eric Clapton, Issac Hayes, Travis Tritt, Erika Bahdu, the list goes on. There's more cameos in this flick than you can shake a stick at. Although why you'd want to shake a stick at a cameo is beyond me.

Now let's be honest, these guys know their music, and it kicks. But it takes way too long to get to any of the musical numbers, and the wait is excruciatingly painful. There is only one true car crash worth mentioning. Too little too late.

By the way, Joe Morton can sing like there's no tomorrow. Cat's got some lungs!!!

OK, I'm giving Blues Brothers 2000 2 1/3 Babylons. Just a sad ride that demeans the original. Don't trouble yourself, go see Titanic instead.

Peace.

Editor's Note:

Greetings. My name is Reginald Howser, and I'm the new editor for The Self-Made Critic.

The aforementioned views are the sole opinion of said Critic, and do not, in any way, reflect the views of, say, me. Personally, I think he's wrong, and that this movie was of high quality. But then, looking back at his previous reviews, I can't see how anyone takes him seriously.

Have a nice day.

Blues Brothers 2000
Rated: PG-13
Directed By: John Landis
Starring: Dan Aykroyd, John Goodman, Joe Morton and anyone who's ever picked up a blues guitar.