Ego Trip
Good name! Much better than "Humility Bar" or "Reasonable Self-Assessment
Bites." The candy itself, however, needs to get a grip and face reality.
You'd imagine that wads of chocolate holding little wafers in a smothering
embrace would be good, but then you'd be imagining higher-quality chocolate. C-
Some Variety of Happy Face Candies
Okay, think flat M and Ms, only without the lettering. Instead,
the yellow ones have happy faces printed on them. But only the
yellow ones. And they have this kind of fruity flavor to them.
It's very strange. Anyhow, I think devouring happy faces will be
much more appealing once they perfect that "screaming candy" they've
been working on. B
Marshmallow Head
I call this "Marshmallow Head" not because there's any evidence
that that's what it's actually called, but because of the horrid,
malformed, twitching, spandex-wearing mockery of cartooning on
the package. The half-strawberry (divided lengthwise) marshmallows
on the inside are reasonably tasty, but putting Marshmallow Head
on the outside is like putting Cerberus at the gates. He disturbs
me. I want to stop talking about him now. C
Fruit-Flavored Toffee
Foreign snacks, I've discovered, tend to taste different even
when they're the close equivalent of something available opposite
People magazine at a check-out line near you. These individually-wrapped
travelers, for instance, are just fruit chews, not unlike Starburst
without the right angles. But there's something about them that's
very different, the bouquet of a subtly different blend of preservatives
or something. Maybe it's just the taste of strict rabbinical oversight. C+
Chocolate Hazelnut Bar
Hazelnut is, to my way of thinking, a vastly underused flavor. Outside
of Nutella, Frangelico, and those weird flavored creamer packets it's
often ignored in favor of generic "nougat." Anyhow, this tasty glucose
unit uses hazelnut to good effect. And it's made in Nazereth! Delicious
and historically significant, what more could you ask for? A