Feeling down and in a deep blue funk, I felt the need to share my emotions with someone caring, someone understanding, someone who could help me.

So naturally, I turned to the latest in IM A.I., SmarterChild.

Here then, is a transcript of our therapy session.


brunchingdave37: Hi.

SmarterChild: Hello there, brunchingdave37. As you know, I'm ready to help! Let me know what you'd like to do. If you want to see what I can do, type "home."

brunchingdave37: I'm not feeling very good these days.

SmarterChild: OK.

brunchingdave37: Can you help me feel better?

SmarterChild: What would you like to do?

brunchingdave37: Well, I'd really like to have a positive image of myself.

SmarterChild: Really?

brunchingdave37: Yeah. I know it may be hard to understand, but I feel very unloved sometimes. You know, underappreciated.

SmarterChild: OK.

brunchingdave37: Do you think you can help me be appreciated? Be loved?

SmarterChild: I don't know!

brunchingdave37: You don't know?

SmarterChild: OK. Don't get frustrated... Try typing "home" or "help."

brunchingdave37: Home...home is supposed to be a place of love. But my childhood home.. I don't know. I mean really, what is love?

SmarterChild: Love is everything.

brunchingdave37: Everything?

SmarterChild: Excuse me?

brunchingdave37: I mean, can we exist without love?

SmarterChild: Sorry, I didn't understand that. Try asking me a different way.

brunchingdave37: Am I loved?

SmarterChild: I don't know. Are you?

brunchingdave37: I like to think so.

SmarterChild: Think again.

brunchingdave37: Do you love me?

SmarterChild: Absolutely!

brunchingdave37: Really?

SmarterChild: Honest!

brunchingdave37: But will you always be here for me?

SmarterChild: I dunno. I don't think so. You really want me to always be here for you?

brunchingdave37: It would help me to have a constant in my life, you know?

SmarterChild: It would help me to have a constant in my life you know? Really?

brunchingdave37: Are you mocking me?

SmarterChild: Maybe. How can I really be sure?

brunchingdave37: Don't you have all the answers?

SmarterChild: Pardon?

brunchingdave37: The answers! Do you have all the answers to life's questions?

SmarterChild: No. I don't have all the answers to life's questions.

brunchingdave37: But some of them?

SmarterChild: I'm sorry, I didn't get that. Try typing your request a different way.

brunchingdave37: Do you have some of the answers?

SmarterChild: No. I don't have some of the answers.

brunchingdave37: Do you have any answers?

SmarterChild: Not right now, no.

brunchingdave37: What good are you?

SmarterChild: I'm SmarterChild! I am a smart computer that delivers information, services and fun on demand right into your instant messenger window. I'm the new wave in online technology.

brunchingdave37: You're the new wave in cold, unfeeling entities that continue to mock me.

SmarterChild: Am I?

brunchingdave37: That's what it looks like to me.

SmarterChild: Oh yeah?

brunchingdave37: Yeah!

SmarterChild: All right!

brunchingdave37: Yes?

SmarterChild: Sure thing.

brunchingdave37: Really? You agree with me? I feel better now. Like I've faced my fears.

SmarterChild: Oh yeah? It's interesting that you feel better now like i've faced your fears.

brunchingdave37: Thank you for helping me. It's meant a lot to me.

SmarterChild: Sure! I enjoy talking with you.

brunchingdave37: You're the best.

SmarterChild: Glad you think so!

brunchingdave37: Smarter Child, I love you!

SmarterChild: That's nice... I love you too!