The modern movie rating system was created in 1968. Soon to follow were music ratings, video game ratings, television ratings, and independent online movie ratings in which films are marked down for discussing evolution.

All of these warnings, labels, and advisories have had two effects on the youth of America. First, none. Second, parents are increasingly astonished that raising children still requires taking an active interest and involvement in what they do, perhaps more than ever now that kids can use the rating to easily avoid G-rated baby stuff like Doug's First Movie and Buena Vista Social Club.

This, however, is America; we don't have to put up with that sort of thing. Perhaps, with a little tweaking, ratings can go beyond mere advice and actually raise children. Examples follow, to get the family-friendly juices of our lawmakers flowing: